Dating in my 40s

She mistrusts men and often blames herself for the rejection she’s felt, believing that she just wasn’t good enough.She says things like “I need him to say he wants a relationship, and then I’ll open up,” or “Once he gets to know me, he probably won’t like me.” The Scaredy Cat may put her guy through lots of tests before she feels confident that he’s truly interested.

She mistrusts men and often blames herself for the rejection she’s felt, believing that she just wasn’t good enough.She says things like “I need him to say he wants a relationship, and then I’ll open up,” or “Once he gets to know me, he probably won’t like me.” The Scaredy Cat may put her guy through lots of tests before she feels confident that he’s truly interested.I’ve talked to countless single men over the years about their experiences with women, especially those in midlife and beyond.

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This “I’m never going to find a good relationship” gal leaves men unable to get any traction during courting or in a relationship.

The wall she has erected is just too high for him to climb in order to get to the other side.

She insists he give and give with little or no reciprocity; after all, he’s The Man and she’s his prize!

The 18 Year Old The 18-year-old dates – sometimes a lot – but she doesn’t have relationships because “she doesn’t want the men who want her, and the men she wants don’t want her.” She doesn’t know what will make her happy and has not yet learned how to communicate and relate to grownup men.

By default, she clings to the same type of guy she wanted in high school or college. (See the Wow Me Woman below.) The nice, relationship-minded men get quickly discarded by the 18-year-old.

Try as he might, the 60-year-old fabulous guy can’t measure up to her expectations because she’s looking for a man who doesn’t exist.

Her life isn’t going the way she wants and she just can’t figure out why.

With men, she might complain that they just “don’t get her,” but the truth is that she’s giving them every reason to head for the hills with her off-handed comments and negativity.

She believes her sexuality is the only way she can attract a man, or she wants this point in her life to be a series of sexual experiences. She posts a provocative picture on her online dating profile, invites him over to her house on the first date, shows too much skin (especially for a woman over 40), and is overly familiar with her affection.

The Sexpot offers herself up on the first date and is offended if her date doesn’t partake. Relationship-minded men may also say “yes” even though they may feel somewhat emasculated or turned off by her aggressiveness.