I love when it's secretly taken care of when I am in the bathroom (pro move).But does being a feminist mean that the check should always be split down the middle? (Yes.) Should hetero couples look to same-sex couples for some clarity?I offer to pay when I am the "asker," but I would say only about one out of 10 of those men let me pay — and that one time, we split the bill.
I offered to split the $52 tab, and he said, "I love when girls reach for their wallet like they're actually going to pay for anything." As if the hour he had spent waxing poetic about Dave Matthews hadn't turned me off already, his very mature handling of the "who will pay for the date" dilemma sealed the deal. He dragged me for my wallet reach, while also being frustrated that he was going to pay for the entire tab — but he refused to let me pay when I tried.
While I don't mind being treated to drinks, I also don't mind paying for things — even on dates.
Once upon a time, my date decided the best way to wrap up drinks was to scold me for reaching for my wallet. I actually feel sort of fancy slapping my plastic down to cover an entire bill.
When the check came, his credit card beat mine to the table. I know some of you are thinking, "Maybe he meant it in a chivalrous, flirtatious way? What confounded me about this particular dude was that he seemed triggered by my attempt to pay.
Additionally, down the road, we're the ones to carry babies and suffer all of that physical pain alone.
There are simply some parts of life in which men and women are not yet equal.(@ me, trolls, because I know you're coming.) When people suggest that, in order to be equal, women must be willing to assume some of the responsibilities men have — like paying for a date or an engagement ring — I say, "Sure, absolutely, once we're paid equally!" Even if you don't particularly spend a lot of money grooming your hair or nails before a date, you might spend money on birth control that your male partner does not.This "rule" goes for hetero couples only, and this rule is not a rule to follow for all dates for all of eternity.This is a wild card that I am throwing out there to justify why men often pay for dates, so don't take me too seriously.Check out the entire Gen Why series and other videos on Facebook and the Bustle app across Apple TV, Roku, and Amazon Fire TV. It’s not unusual for the average guy to take a movie title—50 First Dates—and turn it into real life, only now it’s closer to 100.The gender pay gap is real: Women make less money than their male counterparts (and I am not even taking race into account).So while this third "rule" is a little sassy, I think it's worth thinking about. We're all adults, and we should be able to handle taking care of a check at the end of an evening together.On a first date, it's rude to assume you know how much money your date makes or does not make simply based on their job.(Sometimes, that vague "entrepreneur" on their dating app profile really does mean "entrepreneur.") If your date insists on whipping out their black Am Ex, let them.