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He’d never imagined that so many single people were out there.“I’m about 95 percent certain,” he says, “that if I’d met Rachel offline, and if I’d never done online dating, I would’ve married her.You know what to do with women, how to treat them and talk to them.
“I went from being someone who thought of finding someone as this monumental challenge, to being much more relaxed and confident about it.
Rachel was young and beautiful, and I’d found her after signing up on a couple dating sites and dating just a few people.” Having met Rachel so easily online, he felt confident that, if he became single again, he could always meet someone else.
“It’s always ‘I wish I was as important as the basketball game or the concert.’ ” An only child, Jacob tended to make plans by negotiation: if his girlfriend would watch the game with him, he’d go hiking with her.
He was passive in their arguments, hoping to avoid confrontation.
Before long, his new relationship fell into that familiar pattern.
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“I’ve never been able to make a girl feel like she was the most important thing in my life,” he says.
But most of the online-dating-company executives I interviewed while writing my new book, Love in the Time of Algorithms, agreed with what research appears to suggest: the rise of online dating will mean an overall decrease in commitment.
“The future will see better relationships but more divorce,” predicts Dan Winchester, the founder of a free dating site based in the U. “The older you get as a man, the more experienced you get.
She placed a high value on things he didn’t think much about: a solid credit score, a 40-hour workweek.
Jacob also felt pressure from his parents, who were getting anxious to see him paired off for good.